An open heart is accepting, resourceful, & in the flow of time. It takes things as they come and responds with an instinctive sense of purpose & priority. When we live with open hearts, we are naturally authentic, and we act within our integrity.
A closed heart is stiff, fixated, & lost in mental absorption. It insists on gettings its way, without regard for others, or for what really matters most. When we live with closed hearts, we struggle to connect with others & with life, and we act from impulsiveness & fear rather than integrity.
Michael Singer has some nice guidance on how to open your heart. He first describes "the pull" of compulsive thinking trying to yank us back into selfishness, reactivity, & impulsivity. He then lays out a method for opening the heart, even in the flurries of stress & discomfort.
Check out his book Untethered Soul for the whole shebang.
Here are some relevant snips:
When you feel the pull, like somebody pulling on your heart, you just let go. You fall behind it. You simply relax and release. And no matter how many times you’re pulled, that’s how many times you relax and release. Because the tendency to get drawn in is constant, the willingness to let go and fall behind has to be constant.
Michael A. Singer, The Untethered Soul: The Journey Beyond Yourself
Do not let anything that happens in life be important enough that you are willing to close your heart over it. When your heart starts to close just say, “No. I’m not going to close. I’m going to relax. I’m going to let this situation take place and be there with it.” Honor and respect the situation, and deal with it. By all means deal with it. Do the best you can. But deal with it with openness. Deal with it with excitement and enthusiasm. No matter what it is, just let it be the sport of the day. In time, you will forget how to close. No matter what anyone does, no matter what situation takes place, you won’t even feel the tendency to close. You will just embrace life with all your heart and soul.
Michael A. Singer, The Untethered Soul: The Journey Beyond Yourself
Here's my advice, which is pretty similar to his:
relax
let thoughts be thoughts
feel into the heart
feel it beating
feel any feelings coursing through the heart
breathe
sense your existence
your addicted mind will yank you back into compusive thinking - the addicted mind is clever & lightning quick
don't gripe, don't compete
be the tortoise, not the hare
practice compassion at a comfortable,sustainable pace
practice compassion by repeating the cycle:
relax
let thoughts be thoughts
feel into the heart
feel it beating
feel any feelings coursing through the heart
breathe
sense your existence