Through heart-to-heart dialogue, Patty overcame social anxiety and made meaningful connections
If you struggle with social anxiety or dread about the future, I encourage you to read this inspiring success story about my client, Patty.
In early December of 2023, Patty was feeling anxious about her upcoming company holiday party.
She found herself obsessing over the party and worrying how it would go.
The prior year, she'd felt like she was on an island at the party.
Patty is the assistant to the company president, whom I'll call Jeff. At last year's party, Patty had sat at Jeff's table and stayed by Jeff's side for much of the event. As a result, she felt like she didn't connect with her colleagues in an authentic way. She sensed they viewed her as merely an extension of Jeff, and so they felt unsure how to approach her and connect with her.
Patty sensed this and felt uncomfortable. From that point on, it felt like she was just going through the motions and waiting for the awkward holiday party to finish. She had a hard time enjoying the event. She saw other people smiling, laughing, and enjoying their conversations. Patty felt like she was on the outside looking it. She felt like the party was an energy drain and a missed opportunity for connection and enjoyment.
The 2023 holiday party was coming up next week, and Patty didn't want this year to be like last year.
She reached out to me for guidance.
Patty and I engaged in a one-hour spiritual dialogue.
First, we did a visualization exercise. I asked Patty to think back to a social situation where she felt completely comfortable and at ease.
Patty said she felt that way when she and her friends got together to be around horses. Through our discussion, Patty recognized that one of the reasons those horse gatherings were so comfortable is because everyone there shared a common passion and purpose: enjoying the company of horses together.
I then helped Patty bridge the gap between her horse gatherings and the Christmas party. I asked her: what are the "horses" of your company? In other words: what is a common passion or purpose that unites everyone there?
Patty replied that the uniting force of her company was the company's deceased founder, whom I'll call Terry. Terry was a visionary author who shared profound, inspiring messages of love, togetherness, and peace. Patty said that everyone in the company revered Terry and cherished their memories of her. Patty shared how deeply she loved Terry and how honored she was to be working for a company that carried on Terry's legacy.
I suggested that Patty go to the holiday company party with the goal of honoring Terry's spirit. I invited Patty to imagine that Terry was with her at the party, standing right behind her shoulder. Every time she saw a colleague, it was an opportunity to connect with the colleague in Terry's spirit. I encouraged Patty to treat the party as an opportunity to enrich her connection to both Terry and her colleagues.
I heard the relief and growing excitement in Patty's voice. "Wow" and "yes!" became her refrains. Patty began describing different ways she could implement this plan. She pictured herself starting conversations with colleagues she didn't know, and she sensed how Terry's spirit could guide and inspire her to connect with her colleagues in a meaningful way.
Patty thanked me for the guidance and said she was now eager to attend the party, because she finally had a clear sense of purpose, one that was infused with her love for Terry and her desire to connect more deeply with her colleagues.
I wished Patty luck and asked her to keep me posted on how it went.
The day after the party, Patty reached out and shared an update.
She told me she had "an absolutely amazing time" at the party!
She said colleagues at the party came up to her and told her: "I was kind of apprehensive coming up to you before - but you are so nice!"
Patty told me that thanks to how things went at the party, she had a "very full heart today!"
Patty told me that instead of sitting at Jeff's table like she had the year prior, this year she sat at the table with the customer service team, whom she didn't know that well. Patty said she took the initiative and introduced four of the company's newest hires to Jeff!
The prior year, Patty had felt like she was on the outside looking in.
In 2023, Patty was not only interacting with her colleagues - she was facilitating meaningful interaction between her colleagues, too. And isn't that exactly what her company's founder, Terry, would have wished! Through heart-to-heart dialogue, Patty overcame her social anxiety and made meaningful connections with her colleagues.
In Patty's words: "It was great! It just flowed. Thanks to YOU!"
If you struggle with social anxiety or dread about the future, I want to work with you.
As you can see from Patty's story, I don't use a cookie-cutter, one-size-fits-all approach.
Instead, I listen carefully as you describe your struggle. Then, we dialogue about the struggle and potential solutions. Through that dialogue, we organically gain insights into the roots of the struggle, and we discover strategies for approaching the difficult situation in a more empowering way. The result is a customized solution inspired by your own words and tailored to your specific situation.
The spiritual dialogue process worked wonders for Patty.
I'm excited to see how spiritual dialogue will serve you!
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Let's discuss how YOU can overcome social anxiety and truly enjoy your social outings.
Love,
Joe
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